Pokemon Cards

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    Dio
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    Pokemon Cards

    Post  Dio on Thu Aug 05, 2010 3:27 pm

    Ok, as per the request of The Fastest I will teach folks how to play pokemon cards,

    Ok, first thing you need a deck of 60 cards, atleast one coin to flip and a buddy who also has a deck of 60 cards. First you need to shuffle your decks, or eachother's deck if you don't trust eachother like that. It's cool, you paranoid fuck.

    You decide on a bet of heads or tails opposing your opponent's bet to decide who goes first, you then both draw 6 cards from your deck, each time it becomes your turn you draw a card from the deck; You should note that you can lay one card on the field of play per turn and use one attack per turn or alternatively to using an attack you may swith between the pokemon that you have on the field of play!

    To note you can have up to 6 cards in your hands, if a card is discarded from the hand, used up or knocked out of play by the opponent it will go to the card graveyard. Make sure to keep track of whats in the graveyard because you don't want to accidentally rely on a card coming up thats been used allready!

    We'll start by detailing a non-evolved pokemon card,

    What we have here is obviiously a starfish with a gem in the middle, the creative energies that went into it's form are obviously beyond out levels so lets not go into that.
    However as you can see it has one attack, Slap. Next to the Slap attack to the left we see that there is a water symbol, meaning you need to attach one Water Energy Card to Staryu before he can slap people's shit.
    To the right of slap we see that it does 20 damage, in other words if two staryu's got into a slap up it'ld take four attacks. How do we know this? Well in the upper right of the card we can see the pokemon's health and element; oh but your saying 20*4>40 eh? Well thats because Slap is a water attack ; which isn't effective against other Water element pokemon and only does half damage! If Staryu was slapping up a fire pokemon or presumably any crazy fool who runs at it on fire it would do 40 damage! Thats why you don't get fire Staryu's anymore folks, because Staryu slapped their shit.


    Who's that pokemon, It's Starme! This bastard is the evolved form of Starme which has obviously fallen into radioactive purple paint and grown extra limbs. So long as you have a Staryu on the field you can place the starme card onto them to evolve them ; this is obviously a stupid ass idea since Starme can't slap shit. He can however use two water energy cards to heal himself, or use one water energy card and two normal energy cards in order to freeze some stars; crazy bastard is clearly plotting to wipe out life on earth or something!
    Anyway in the lower left we can see that Starme is weak against electric element and in the upper right we can see he has 60 health, however if he took damage as a Staryu he retains that damage when he evolves!

    Some crazy monsters have 3 stages of evolution, be careful since if you want the 3rd pokemon in the chain you'll have to evolve up from step 1. Unless you've a dirty trick of an effect card...

    Effect cards, what the shit are those? They're cards which have special effects which you can play instead of a monster card, they should have all details their requirements and effects on the card! If your slappin' ain't working for you because you've too many Monster cards and not enough energy cards coming out of your deck then you might want a few extra-draw cards to stock up your hand

    Well, this is all well and good but your deck contains something stupid like 60 cards man! What the heck!? Well the good news is that if you have your mean beat down team of Staryu's then you only have to slap up 6 of your opponent's pokemon in order to win! Likewise if you both act like twats and use all kind of trap card shit in order to avoid having your Staryu's knocked out then whoever runs out of cards first loses!


    Did I miss anything?
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    mcmicken
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    Re: Pokemon Cards

    Post  mcmicken on Thu Aug 05, 2010 3:42 pm

    Aye. Trap cards. Pokémon HATE trap cards.

    Oh and the infamous "fag rule" where basically if you have a Pikachu in your deck and you draw it from your deck you get pillaged up the ass and your village gets raped. By men. Lots of men. Yugi included.
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    Dio
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    Re: Pokemon Cards

    Post  Dio on Thu Aug 05, 2010 3:48 pm


    <Insert Caption Here.>
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    Re: Pokemon Cards

    Post  Mute on Fri Aug 06, 2010 4:34 am

    Dio wrote:
    <Insert Caption Here.>

    0 energy - instantly removes all enemy pokemon
    "lol umadbro?"

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    Re: Pokemon Cards

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